The sitcom “Friends” was such a massive hit that by the end of the series, each of the six main cast members was making a million dollars per episode. Here are some wildly funny quotes that show us just why the show was so popular.
Chandler (emerging from the bathroom with an issue of “Cosmo” magazine): “Alright, I just took the quiz, and as it turns out I do put career before men.”
Chandler: “You know what’s weird? Donald Duck never wore pants. But whenever he’s getting out of the shower, he puts a towel around his waist. I mean, what is that about?”
Joey: “Remember when you were a little kid and your mom would drop you off at the movies with a jar of jam and a little spoon?”
Chandler: “Okay. Janice said ‘Do I look fat today?’, and I looked at her …”
Ross: “Whoa, whoa. You looked at her? You never look. You just answer, it’s just a reflex. Do I look fat? No! Is she prettier than I am? No! Does size matter?”
Ross: “And it works both ways.”
Rachel (reading the program at Joey’s play): “Oh! Look, look! Look, there’s Joey’s picture! This is so exciting!”
Chandler: “You can always spot someone who’s never seen one of his plays before. Notice, no fear, no sense of impending doom.”
Rachel (who has written a romance novel): “Okay, now this is just the first chapter and I want your absolute honest opinion. Oh, and on page two, he’s not reaching for her ‘heaving beasts’.”
Monica: “What’s a ‘niffle’?”
Joey: “You usually find them on the heaving beasts.”
Rachel: “Alright, alright, so I’m not a great typist.”
Ross: “Wait, did you get to the part about his huge throbbing pens? I tell ya, I don’t want to be around when he starts writing with those!”
Chandler: “You guys in the living room all know what you want to do. You know, you have goals. You have dreams. I don’t have a dream.”
Ross: “Ah, the lesser-known ‘I Don’t Have a Dream’ speech.”
Rachel: “I got an interview! I got an interview!”
Rachel: “Saks … Fifth … Avenue!”
Monica: “Oh Rachel!”
Phoebe: “It’s like the mother ship is calling you home!”
Phoebe: “Ooh, Ugly Naked Guy is decorating his tree. Oh my God, you should see the size of his Christmas balls!”
Ross: “Have you ever been, you know, fooling around with a girl, and uh, she started laughing?”
Chandler: “Yeah, but it was 1982 and my Flock of Seagulls haircut was tickling her chin.”
Monica: “Alright, I’ve got a leg, three breasts, and a wing.”
Chandler: “How do you find clothes that fit?”
Ross: I had a dream last night where I was playing football with my kid.
Chandler & Joey: Oh, that’s nice.
Ross: No, no, with him. I’m on this field, and they hike me the baby, and I know I’ve got to do something, ’cause the Tampa Bay defence is coming right at me…
Joey: Tampa Bay has got a terrible team!
Ross: Right, but it is just me and the baby, so I’m thinking they can take us. And so I just heave it down-field.
Chandler: What, you’re kidding? That’s a baby!
Joey: What, he should take the sack?
Chandler: Men are here!
Joey: We make fire! Cook meat!
Chandler: Then put out fire by peeing, no get invited back!
Phoebe: “It’s not mine, I didn’t earn it; if I kept it, it would be like stealing.”
Rachel: “Yeah, but if you spent it, it would be like shopping.”
Rachel: “Pheebs, who’s George Stephanopoulos?”
Phoebe: “That’s Big Bird’s friend.”
Phoebe: “Stop being so testosteroney!”
Chandler: “Which, by the way, is the real San Francisco treat.”
Joey: “They shouldn’t be having S-E-X around the B-A-B-I-E!”
Phoebe: “A stripper at a bachelor party, that is so cliché. Why don’t you guys get a magician?”
Chandler: “Well, if the magician can open my beer with his butt cheeks, then alright.”
Phoebe: “Well, they said that I had to think about it first, but I … what is there to think about? I’m gonna be giving someone the greatest gift you can possibly give.”
Chandler: “You’re gonna carry their child and get them a Sony Play Station?”